Being on church staff, I get to serve in a number of ministries. One of my favorite service opportunities has nothing to do my with my job, though. About once a month, I get to play violin on our worship team. I’ve played since I was in sixth grade. I’m classically trained and, at one point, considered majoring in music when I was in college.
The violin is often a beautiful addition to a worship band. It adds a smooth accent to the other instruments you’re used to hearing. But, given it was designed originally for a string orchestra, it’s also a fish out of water when paired with drums, electric guitar, and electronic keys.
In a string orchestra, there are typically five parts. The bass and cello carry the bass lines and often provide harmony. They create much-needed depth to the music being played. The viola, which is just a pretty strange instrument, often fluctuates between assisting with melody and harmony. And the violin, which comprises up to half of the players on the stage, is divided into two sections – first and second violin. Due to its range, the violin section almost always carries the melody. Few instruments play more and carry the day more than the violins. For classically trained violinists, our instinct is to let that violin sing out whenever we play.
But in a worship band, the violin is the least important instrument on the stage. It’s not the hero in the band. It’s the accent. It’s the cherry on top of everything else the congregation hears. There are moments where the violin adds a beautiful, special touch that really stands out. But those moments only make a difference if the player pulls back at other times. In other words, our silence on the stage is as important as our voice. Our silence makes the moments we actually do play that much more beautiful and notable.
The Power of Silence
The same goes for our words and our opinions. In the book of Proverbs, we find a running theme of instructions and warnings that challenge the wise to show discretion in their speech. Sometimes, this even means not speaking. Like a beautiful instrument, our voices matter, but that doesn’t mean they should be used at all times. Notice these cautions:
Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent.
Proverbs 11:12
A prudent man conceals knowledge,
but the heart of fools proclaims folly.
Proverbs 12:23
Whoever restrains his words has knowledge,
and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.
Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise;
when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.Proverbs 17:27-28
It’s not hard find of examples of this playing out in normal life. Have you ever noticed how often the loudest voice in the room is usually the least knowledgable? Usually the angriest and most belligerent person in a debate tends to only prove his ignorance, rather than his expertise and convictions.
Embracing Silence
Wisdom doesn’t just mean speaking truthfully, graciously, and courageously. It also means speaking prudently. It means knowing when not to speak. It means knowing when there is value to your voice being added to the conversation and when you’re really just making things worse. There’s a huge difference between talking and actually saying something. The wisest people know how to talk less but say more in the process.
If you always have an opinion and you always make it heard, you eventually just sound like background noise. If you’re always shouting, people stop paying attention. If your default posture is anger and frustration, your credibility will eventually be impacted. But, in contrast, Proverbs 15:28 says:
The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer,
but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.
That word “ponders” in the Hebrew is literally translated “weighs.” In other words, the righteous person considers, contemplates, meditates, and even studies his answer before giving it. The wise person is careful with how he expresses his opinions. His words are planned. They’re used artfully, not flippantly.
Your Opinion Isn’t Required
One of the side effects of living in such a divided and polarizing world is that we feel a constant need to make our positions known. We are very quick to form opinions without all of the facts. We want people to know which side we’re on, who we stand with, and we want to do it forcefully. Unfortunately, social media, in particular, provides the perfect outlet for that.
In other words, our culture has created an environment where our most foolish impulses are rewarded. The very thing that’s cautioned in Proverbs is celebrated, especially in our online discourse.
But it’s important to remember that it’s okay to not have an opinion. It’s okay to not know where you stand. It’s okay to struggle with your position on an issue. That doesn’t mean you lack conviction. It simply means that you’re humble and wise enough to recognize that you may not be the expert on a given situation. You may not have all the facts. You may not have studied Scripture enough or read up on the current events you want to offer commentary on. And in these cases, silence is not just acceptable. It’s preferable.
Like a beautiful instrument, the voice God gave you is valuable. When used prudently, it can even be beautiful. But that doesn’t mean it should be used in all situations. True wisdom means knowing when to speak and when to pull back. It means reserving your voice for the issues that matter the most and saving it in the times that don’t require it. True wisdom means knowing when to use it and when to put it away.
